How can I cope with a husband who cheated?

My husband and I have been married for 5 months, and we're also 9 months pregnant. I found out two days ago that he cheated. It was only once, approximately three weeks prior, and now the girl was claiming she was pregnant, and it was his. We now know she's not pregnant at all, which is a relief. I've decided to forgive him; I love him more than words can say. I need to know how to learn to trust him again, and how to help him forgive himself.How can I cope with a husband who cheated?
Well first of all I like to say Wish you both the best were all humans and make mistakes . Glad you can overcome this and move on with your lives.





your question you need to know how to learn to trust him again. Well that will take time and by him showing you he can be trusted that doesn't happen over night.





And how to help him forgive himself. For starters don't bring up the affair again. If you truely forgive him and want it out of your lives you need to heal and move on so by throwing it back in his face will not heal the wounds you both have. So when ever you fight and there will be times don't bring that into the argument stick with whats at hand.





And commend him when he's showing you by actions just not idle chat he means what he says he needs reinforncement and also needs to know he is human and you love him and forgive him and you get through this and be stronger in the long run.





Treat him normally like you would don't act any different best thing for you both is to go turn the page and move ahead without making him feel guilty . You both have to heal and carry on and sounds like your both willing to do that so i wish you both the very best.





good luckHow can I cope with a husband who cheated?
Men are human, they will make mistakes. If this is the first time and he feels that badly and you want to forgive him then just let it go. Don't act suspicious and treat it like you love him and you have forgiven him. He may never stray again and that is what you are both thriving for. He has already been convicted for this time if he can't forgive himself. Just don't punish him for what you are afraid he will do in the future. If you make him do the time he will do the crime, if I may. You need to sit and talk about it WITH him not TO him and make your decisions on what is best to do for you both to let it go. This is called forgiving, you will never forget and niether will he. Oh, when you discuss it, don't act accusingly, he will get defensive and pull away. Also, let him do most the talking, it will help him to forgive himself and you will be able to see his anguish to give you a more positive state of mind. I hope things work out, God Bless.
Sometimes the hardest thing about love is accepting someone for their faults and errors. Expectations are the mother of suffering, you have to realize you don't have control of his cheating. If he is going to do it he will. And if he does it is probably because he isn't happy with his situation and thinks a fling will improve it, and obviously he will realize it didn't improve anything. So on the same point, he has to realize his life probably won't turn out like he expected it to and he needs to learn to be happy with who and where he is.


His guilt is related to you, once he knows you have completely forgave him, only then will he forgive himself. He will never be the same if he thinks you still hold it against him.
oh boy...you can forgive but i will tell you straight up , you never forget it! it is there everyday. several times a day! if you have promised to forgive him , you need to just cope now. but i am telling you , you never get over it!
Just trust your babies daddy, he sleeps around but you already knew that before you married him
Talk to him about how you feel. It will take some time for him to Eran your trust back, But give it a try a least for the baby.





I hope things work out for you.
You have choose to forgive him 1 time and good for you... however the trust may never come back... the both of you have to realize that... you trusted him and he cheated and broke that trust. Good luck.
i dont wanna sound mean but youre crazy. if he cheats once hell cheat again!!
The sad part isnt about you or him, its about the children.





Reports show that approximately 85% of youth in prison, 85% of children with behavioral disorders, 75% of adolescents in substance abuse treatment centers, 71% of all high school dropouts, and 70% of adults serving long-term prison sentences come from fatherless homes. 63% of youth suicides are from fatherless homes. 90% of all homeless and runaway children are from fatherless homes and 85% of all children that exhibit serious behavioral disorders come from fatherless homes. Children from fatherless homes are 5 times more likely to commit suicide, 9 times more likely to drop out of high school, 10 times more likely to abuse drugs, 20 times more likely to end up in prison and to have behavioral disorders, and 32 times more likely to run away than their peers who grow up in intact families with both birth parents
if you've only been married 5 months and he has already cheated then you don't need him. he will do it again. I believe forgiveness is an option the first time but you really should dump him if he does it again.
Counseling classes.
Being that you married him, yes he deserves the second chance, ONLY if this is the first time he has EVER cheated on you. Everyone deserves a second chance (even though it is kind of EARLY in your marriage for this crap to happen!). You are doing your part by forgiving him, just remember that when you forgive, it doesn't make you forget. And being that you chose to forgive him, you CAN'T constantly throw it up in his face, because if you do that, it will never work. If you find out that he is still seeing the girl, carrying on a relationship with her, or if he does it again, you need to get out of the marriage. It's not worth being miserable to have him. I've been there, so I know it's easier said than done, but you and your CHILD are what's most important now.
Well to truly trust him 100% will take time. Lots of time. The only way to start your way to trust again is to forgive him. Do not forget it, but you have to let it go. Just make sure he's willing to put in the extra effort to help you start the process. If he doesn't want to do that, then I'm sorry to say... you'll have to move on! Good luck =)
I'm a guy, and from my perspective, you need to get rid of his *** he cheated on you when you needed him most, and at a time when he should be happy as a pig in pooh about his baby coming. Instead he went out and got laid by some other chick..if you keep him be prepared to keep finding out he has bonked another chick..and just might be someone elses babydaddy..You don't want that, and its not fair for the kid to grow up seeing you being abused like that, because then the baby as it grows will think its ok to do that sort of thing..depending whether or not its a boy or a girl
he cheated while you were pregnant...dirty man...but one trust is broken its nearly impossible to get it back. If you love him like you say you do then the est thing is to just put it in the back of your mind and don't think about it. You will never forget the best you can do is try not to always think about it.
I'd tell him after the baby is born if it is ok with him if you go out and have the same fun like he had
The truth be told, most people put up with infidelity. So your pregnant, if anything he should be faithful out of respect! Your carrying his unborn child. The deal is, is that you will probably never get over it. It will eventually go to the back of your mind and not be thought of everyday. Then when he is late coming home or not answering the phone you will assume the worse. Most people secretly put up with their partners infidelity. Because you have already made up your ming to stay with him, you need to make sure that sincerely regrets what he has done. MAKE him earn trust. Just don't count on him to be true and faithful.
I'm sorry to hear that your going thrugh this...My husband Well now ex husband cheated on me when i was 4 months preagnant..We tryed many times to work things out but I always found out about someone alse...Till this day he cheats on his new girlfriend...Once a cheater always a cheater...Sad but true..
kick his *** out, he will do it over and over
It is quite possible that you may never regain trust again.


The truth is, the two of you aren't even past the newlywed stage and he's already cheated.


What makes you think he won't do it again in years to come?


He doesn't respect or love you. I swear by this. Any man that loves and respects his wife will NOT take part in infidelity.


I know that with you, it's a difficult situation. You're about to have your baby any day now. I think right now you shouldn't focus on your husband and what he did, worry about the baby. After she is born and her age starts progressing, you should go to marriage counseling (although I believe once a cheater, always a cheater) to help you start trusting him again.
I think it's mighty swell of you to forgive him. I would have a really hard time with that. For you to be able to trust him 100% again will take a long time though. A lot of people would just dump him and move on, and I admire what you're trying to do here to make your relationship work. The best thing I can offer is counselling. It's extremely helpful and can put both of you back on the right track. You need to be careful though. If you forgive him too easily he's bound to do this again and again because he knows he can get away with it. Make sure you you make it perfectly clear to him how unacceptable it is in your eyes. I really hope everything works out for you, good luck.
Trust yourself, that's all I could do. I may be right may be wrong but, if I went with what I felt and not what other people think then I'm o.k. Not great but o.k. Make sure you know the truth, then trust what you feel. Know you maybe wrong however, you know why you made your decision. I was a cheater and I don't think once a cheater always a cheater. Everyone suffers from bad choices.....some not so many people know about......your child is a blessing no matter what!!! Make it this simple if you can. Write down on paper what you need, stipulations and what not, and let him tell you if he can do this for you... then it's his chance to decide if you can trust him or not. It wasn't your decision to cheat so don't let it be your decision to trust him, let it be his!
get him to tattoo your name on his chest. or else, you should propose a divorce and a child support. good luck and may the force strong with you.
my man cheated on me also. Everyone deserves chances. But you are married and a baby is on the way. Let him deal with what he did with himself so he knows the pain you felt when you found out. Dont let other people tell you to kick him to the curb. its about you guys and no one else. if you love him make it work!! **** happens thats life, dont believe the other woman always sometimes they get jealous because there not happy and they want everyone else to be also. Trust will take a minute i wont lie but it will come back. hope i helped
Well, to tell you the truth the only thing you can do to trust him again is let time heal the wounds. That is the only advice I can give you let time take care of everything. If he feels guilty, that is a good sign that he loves you, and that he wants to be with you. Like I said just give it some time.
you are in for a long miserable marriage filled with doubt and suspicion. i'm not telling you to leave because a child needs his/her dad, but that won't help you. maybe get him and her on springer where you can beat the tar out of her to show them both that you mean business. there are a lot of good guys out there and you deserve one. maybe he'll see the light before it's too late. best of luck.
super glue his tool to his tool shed
Oh dear god, welcome to a long painful road. I don't tell many people this, in fact none of our friends or family know. But, my wife cheated on me and I kinda forgave her. I can't say 100% because 6 months later and a part of me still hates her. How can you trust him again? you can't. Its a sad, hard fact. I asked myslef the question a million times. she'd say';baby, I'd never hurt you like this again'; But, when we got married in a church before god she said she wouldn't do it in the first place. So, if she could lie to a god she believes in after swearing she wouldn't in his house, why would her saying it after she's lied to me, god, and herself make it true?





The fact is after she cheated we lost our purity. I'm no longer ';one'; with her. In fact, she proved we are two very different people. I love her more than I could put into words, but my lack of trust for her has made that very different. I can't be without her, the thought hurts so bad. But every day it hurts to be with her too. Not one day goes by that I don't hurt about being cheated on. I could have never seen it comming no matter what. Between my wife and I, I am much more fit, healthy, and I get hit on a lot more. I cook, I clean, I'm romantic (I'm hung) and she does nothing in return. Somehow I got cheated on for being a good man. If you want to know how to ever trust him again...let all of us know when you find out again. as far as him forgiving himself. That may never happen. My wife still cries about how badly she broke my heart. But, no matter how bad she feels, I know she can't hurt like I do. I didn't ask to be cheated on, I didn't ask to fall in love with someone who doesn't hold my love in high regard, I didn't ask to be treated like ';the other guy'; after 10 years of being married. Chances are, if I find someone who falls head over heals in love with me and they seem loyal and trustworthy, I'm going to leave my wife and pursue it.





So, if someone else is reading this and your thinking of cheating understand a few things





1. you will regret it.


2. you may think you can live iwthout your mate, but when you concrete it in, you will change your mind


3. You can't go back, it will never be the same











good luck to you, I hope you can find happiness in yourself and learn to be selfish and forget his needs like he obviously forgot yours.
YOU CANT FORGIVE NOR FORGET FROM MY EXPERIENCE THAT NEVER HAPPENED EVEN THOUGH I TRIED SO HARD TO FORGET IT NEVER HAPPENED
Girl get a grip. He stopped temporarily because you found out. I PROMISE YOU, it will happen again. I been in a marriage for 13 yrs. and fed up with the cheating. He told me the first time that he was sorry and that it would never happen again. It happened again, again, again, and again. Now he has an outside child. Whether you deal with it or not, he's not going to discontinue cheating. I PROMISE YOU THAT!
First I think he needs to tell you exactly what made him go out and do such a thing. Find out what he felt was lacking that he needed to find elsewhere. Don't let him bullsh*t you either cause there had to be a reason. I believe communication is the best way to solve every sort of issue. It will definitely take a while to trust him again but it will come back with time.