How do you cope when someone doesnt want you anymore?

My husband had an affair and confessed but he never stopped having sex with me. He even told me he loved me and the girl he had an affair with. How do I cope and move on? I've been faithful and never cheated. Iam having a hard time and I have 2 kids to deal with. How do you get over someone who won't leave you alone. He is a very selfish person and I know that but I can't stop him from leaving me alone. I need some solutions really quick, please!How do you cope when someone doesnt want you anymore?
I believe its not that he wont leave u alone- hes just hanging on to u to avoid child support or to have u as a backup if oh girl leaves him alone. Dont allow yourself to compete for his love with other women! Trust me- there are others out there %26amp; good men r not hard to find...its where you r looking! I know its hard to just let go and honestly I've held on to a relationship that many think I shouldve let go of but its all about what God has revealed to me as in my purpose. Seek God in your decision. Read the book Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren.How do you cope when someone doesnt want you anymore?
Revenge f*ck.
You're in a tough position if you have children and no job.


If you are financially dependent on him, you don't have many options.





Is it possible for you to get someone to care for the children while you either get a job or take some courses in school? The only way out for you is to level the playing field. You can't change him; you can only change how you respond to him.





You only have 2 choices: stay in your situation and do nothing; or do what it takes to get yourself independent of this abusive man. He certainly isn't setting a good example for your children.
Get rid of him. More than likely he'll do it again. Take his butt to the court, get alimony and child support.
I think that you need to move on and get another man. It is easier said then done. He screwed up not you.. Move on and do what you have to do to forget the loser. Good Luck to you!!!
The fact you have two children is tough. The toughest. Also since he is cheating he is putting you at risk for sexually transmitted diseases. I don't know if you want to or can stop having sex with him, but you should. It is VERY tough to get over a man who will not leave you alone. You can never heal and get past it if he is still there telling you the BS he has come to spew every day. IF you want to stay with him, then you both need counseling and he needs to learn to keep his pants zipped and treat you and the kids with R*E*S*P*E*C*T!





Solutions:


1. Stop sleeping with him and he will move on probably (most of them do if cut off)


2. If you have financial security, move out with the children and file for divorce


3. If you don't have financial security, get some help from a women's association, counselor, shelter, your church, family or place of worship...or whatever


4. Talk to someone professional. There are places that are free. It is clear that you need someone to talk to


5. Don't put him down in front of the children because that always backfires.


6. Talk to your girlfriends (someone very trustworthy) and take care of yourself and your heart. If you don't take care of you, then you can't take care of your kids.


7. Try to get enough sleep/rest/eat properly!


8. Have a good cry when you are alone, that always helps me to vent and cry and scream and then get it out so you can move on!


9. If you aren't educated or don't have a job, start working towards those goals to keep yourself together whether with a man or without one!


10. Good Luck!
Get counselling. Only you can decide what you want and need. Only you can make you happy. Figure out why you think this arrangement is okay with you.


It's never a quick solution. It's always work. A counsellor will help you figure it out.
I would divorce him and move on and never look back - but that's just me. I don't believe in second chances. Your husband cheated on me and continued sleeping with you AND this other girl? Talk about not having any respect - he put you at risk for STDs and doesn't even care!!





Get out - run - and do it now!
You keep thinking that while he was having sex with someone else he put the mother of his children in physical jeopardy by having sex with her too.





You and your children deserve better.....keep thinking about that and it'll make it just a bit easier.





Time is the only cure for this....I'm sorry.
madblackwoman, if you are black, then why does your icon have brown skin and brown hair? That's stupid. Go change it to the proper appearance.
Get a restraining order that may help. Selfish people are usually to selfish to listen to reason so don't waste your words. Ignore him, divorce him and get dressed and dolled up and make your life good again alone or with someone else. The best revenge is success. good luck.
I would put an end to it now...Your letting him have his cake an eat it too....no way take his butt to court for divorce then child support..The after he is having to pay you for the kids the other woman will probably vanish with the money...If and when he does come back to you say NO...This man is traumatizing your family...You need to put your foot down and say No..If not for you then for your children...If and when you tell him to leave you alone then let him know you WIll be calling the police if he keeps harrasing you..Dont let him have control of you anymore...After you have put your foot down he will use the kids as an excuse to get to you dont fall for it...he is lying...Do you ant your children to grow up and be like this man? Walking in and out of there lives as he pleases? Walk away for your childrens sake...Also he will give you some kind of disease if he is very sexual with other woman..Your children need you here to be with them...STD's are everywhere...
you just have to take one day at a time....if you can't do that, take one hour at a time....one minute, one second. concentrate on your kids, your job.....if you don't have a job, i'd say get one or get a hobby...something to fill your time and help you concentrate on something else. as for your ';husband,'; you need to leave him behind and get on with better things. not all men are worthless lying cheaters. just tell him that you don't want to have contact with him outside of the children. Time will heal your wounds, and he has obviously already moved on. and i agree with the others who have said that he put you in serious jeapordy of STDs by sleeping with both you and her. if he is doing this now, more than likely he has done it before....or he will do it again. don't waste your time. you deserve better! good luck!
If he wont leave the house then take charge and kick him out of your bed , tell him you refuse to be his toy for his own personal gratifaction just because he cant get the other woman anymore , put your foot down and tell him your not his floor mat for him to wipe his feet on.





I am sorry he is doing this to you I have just gone through this and we have 7 kids aged 17 down to 6 only 3 live with us full time because 2 work and other's live with my husbands ex wives.





It is the most painful thing to go through outside of death , in fact it is like a death , you lost the man you thought you loved and found out you didnt know him at all , and thats the worst feeling in the world.





Its good you have come to the realisation that he is selfish now you just have to believe none of this was your fault and you did nothing to deserve him slipping and sliding into another woman's personal space.





Good luck.
Talk with your pastor or a relationship counselor. These things take time and progress as the other partner that don't want to leave gets agitated. You don't want to bring harm to you are your children so seek professional help.


If you read the Bible it states in 1 Cor. 7 how to present yourself in this situation. This is a tough call but be cautious.
you basically answered your own question.. you said he was selfish.. take it for what it is.. he is in it for himself to keep things going with you. you need to put and end to it by telling him you aren't his doormat where he can come walk all over you any time he wants. be straight forward, get a divorce and find a man who wants you for you and treats you better. if you let him know you won't allow it anymore (and actually stick to your word) eventually he will leave you alone because he won't want to waste any of HIS time
Give him one more chance, if he fails to hold to his promise divorce him.